The Other Woman
by idontgiveadamnsoshutup16
Summary: It's finally the end. We never really stood a chance. I guess it's really better off this way.


A/N: I do not own Icarly.

* * *

_I feel just like an actress, up on the stage__  
__I can't believe, what I'm hearing myself say__  
__And a porch light is my spotlight, so I play along with this lie__  
__That way it won't hurt so much, when we say goodbye_

I opened the door towards the back porch and I almost smiled. (If **t h i s** wasn't so damn painful, I would be touched by the scene in front of me). I can see him sitting with the two children near the front gate, his smile growing larger at _our _little Amy's inquisitiveness.

They look really happy.

(It's a _s h a m e_ that this will probably the last time.)

As they continue chatting about school and bullies and that kind of stuff, I can see him glancing slowly at his wrist watch.

(The end is coming. Very fast.)

He then stares at the street, rather nonchalantly.

(No one would even notice that he's waiting for H E R.)

I let out a small sigh and I look towards the skies. _I knew this was coming. Ever since _her _divorce. Hell, ever since we were in school. This is what he wanted. _

_This is what was supposed to happen._

_(_Before I interfered and ruined their happiness.)

And yet somehow, I still can't help but cry knowing that _he is leaving me for H E R. _

_My heart feels like a circus__  
__It's too much to take in__  
__It's hard to lose a love__  
__But you were my best friend_

The silence is deafening, the air is full of tension. I glanced towards my children, smiling as they continue their idle chatter.

I smiled at _her _and _she _smiles back.

(We are best friends, after all.)

I can see her hurting though. I know she doesn't want this to happen.

_But she loves him too much. _

(As if I don't).

"So, I'll see you guys around, huh?" I politely asked them. I smiled at them.

**(Pretending has never been this difficult. I can no longer breathe.)**

She tried nodding her head. Freddie, on the other hand, won't look at me. I don't know what he feels right now.

_(Are there still lingering traces of love for me in his heart?)_

As I look at him today, I realized that I never really tried to understand him. Throughout all the time that I've known him, I never actually took the time to **t r u l y** comprehend him. I always assumed that there wasn't much to the plain, obsessive, techno-geek producer.

_**I never really saw him. Not the way I should h a v e. **_

But, when my attraction for him grew (and he _reciprocated _in order to FORGET _h e r), _I pretended that everything is okay. Everything is P E R F E C T.

_**(Even though they aren't.)**_

Instead, I let him continue his _c h a r a d e. _I deluded myself into thinking that he loves me.

(ONLY ME).

We loved (used) each other to heal our hurts.

(The pain didn't disappear. Instead, the pain grew stronger the more I fall in love with him.)

_If I seem distant, baby I am__  
__Words are like scissors, in your hands__  
__And there's no script to follow, so I just close my eyes__  
__That way it won't hurt so much, when we say goodbye__  
_

A few more minutes pass, all of us sitting in silence. Even Amy and Franco have stopped their chattering. I glanced at my children's faces and I then look at _my (__soon to be ex-) _husband's eyes.

He looked serious, his eyes almost unreadable.

He looked pained.

(And yet, his eyes are **s m i l i n g**).

It's been a long time since I last saw him that _**truly and sincerely happy**_.

(He's never happy. With me.)

I sighed. This is gonna be difficult. As I look at them, I realized that I didn't want to end things this way.

(I don't want to end things. Period.)

I'm pretty sure he didn't want thing to end this way either.

(But he **did want** this to end.)

I can still remember the initial shock and anger that I felt when he told me that he wanted to divorce.

"_I'm in love with her."_

I also remembered the realization that I had after.

"_Always have. Always will."_

"_I know."_

I guess, in some way, this is my gift to him: FREEDOM.

(Even though the cost is killing me.)

I'm setting him free because I know that I have to make up for all the horrible things I've done **(spreading rumors, breaking them apart, forcing Freddie to marry me)** to them both.

I would give them **this** because I loved him.

(And i still do even though it's already the end).

But also because, he must be free because he _d e s e r v e d _it. For years, I had kept him in a place that he shouldn't be in.

I would let him _**G O.**_

_Did you ever love me? Does it even matter?__  
__Did you even notice, the whole word shatter?__  
__I just want to hold you, and tell you that I'm sorry__  
__But I just keep it all inside__  
__That way it won't hurt so much, when we say goodbye_

I was brought out of my reverie when the doorbell rang.

It is time.

I looked at them and my heart broke when I saw how happy they are, the change in their facial expressions. It was clear that they were holding back their laughter and smiles.

(While I'm holding back my tears).

I can see the attorney approaching our front door, every little step of his is breaking my heart. Freddie walked towards the door and opened it.

There was a pause - the time was finally here.

The time when they could be together after so many years, the time they had been longing for ages.

(The time for me to finally _LET HIM GO.)_

The lawyer nodded his head and I can see Freddie swooping her into a giant hug. She begins to cry softly. They break apart and they stare into each other's eyes.

They cannot see the _other people _around them.

(They cannot see my tears.)

Suddenly, as if remembering that they weren't alone, Freddie turns to whisper to _our_ children. I then caught her eye and nodded. She smiled.

So, this is how it was going to be. We would still be the famous, dysfunctional friends.

Just with a little change.

(My ex-husband will now be her husband.)

Amy and Franco then approached me, ready to go. They already said their goodbyes to their father earlier this day. As we turn to leave, Freddie, for the first time today, approached me, looking me in the eye.

He smiled.

(It's so happy and genuine that it breaks my heart even more.)

He walks up to me, keeping my gaze, and suddenly, without any warning, he hugs me.

(Tears fell from my face.)

"Thank you, Carly." He smiles at me, his face glowing and clearly thankful.

I smiled weakly in return.

"You're welcome, Freddie." I looked behind him, and I smiled at her. Finally, they can be happy. All of us will finally have peace.

"Good luck with him, Sam."

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Okaaaay. I suck at being angsty. :)) Sorry. :| I like my other story better ('The Best Man').

Any, reviews are welcome. :)


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